Please don't let me be getting a migraine now...

[rynne]

So, I have been steadily doing the betaing that I should have done back when I first got the fics I was supposed to beta, only somehow, I have no idea how, I lost two of them. madilayn, orgilion, could you send me your stuff again, to my gmail address (rynnewrites at gmail dot com)? I promise that this time I will be much more prompt, too--now that I'm back at school, I have more of a rhythm than during the summer.

I think I'm definitely getting sick. Bother. I am sneezing and sniffling and generally being far more tired than I should be (took another two hour nap today), even given that I've only been getting six hours of sleep a night, which really isn't that bad. But I hate being sick--too inconvenient, especially this year, when all of my classes are AP or college and so missing things is bad.

Now I really know what musesfool meant when she ranted about ficathons and so on--I hate having a deadline. I know I probably should get used to it if I want to be a professional writer, and I'm usually able to make my deadlines, but they're very unhelpful when I've got another fic idea that I really want to write but know I shouldn't until my fic with the deadline is done because the deadline is approaching. That being said, I've started my FQF fic, and I should be able to finish on time, but I think, once this FQF is over, I'm not going to sign up for anything with a deadline for a good long time.

Question: how the bloody hell does one write Draco Malfoy? I don't like the little ferret at all and rarely read anything involving him, but he's a rather required element in this one fic I'm writing, and he might have to be the POV character, or at least one of the mains, but I don't know what to do with him. Bugger Draco Malfoy.

Do I come across as shy? I just realized how very little I talk to people, with messengers. I mean, I talk to allisonblair fairly often, I talked to xellas last night, and I'm talking to thistlerose right now, but other than the queerditch_pub chats, I don't talk to people on messenger much. And I'd like to, especially with my favorite authors whose screennames I know, like copperbadge and so on, as I'd really like to get to know them better. (Lucky me, though, that my absolute favorite fanfic author, thistlerose, grew to be one of my best friends! We just have so much in common...) Only I'm just very hesitant in starting conversations, unless it's to ask a question, and I wouldn't know what to talk about and I hate it when a conversation just stops for awhile, as I feel sorta guilty for not upholding my end of the conversation and so on. But like, I want to talk to Sam, if only to apologize for being so anal about grammar, and I want to talk to all these other people because I think they're cool, but I just don't like being the one to start conversations. I suspect I'm not the only one who feels this way, but oi, I don't know that I'll be changing that behavior anytime soon. Every single person on my flist that I want to talk to is a person and not a god or anything, but you're all generally people that I admire and look up to and whose respect I want, rather than for you to look at me as an annoyance for bothering you, and so on.

Now I've got a bit of a headache, and if it turns into a migraine I'm going to be pissed, as I don't need a migraine the first week of school. Though of course, getting up at six am every day, and the fact that I'm going on a hike for swordfighting this weekend, and I don't need a migraine. Order of business now should probably to finish Catch-22 (yes, I'm horrible for not having finished it yet), take a migraine pill, and then go and try to get as much sleep as I can.

Comments

[immortalis.livejournal.com]

Oh, no. I think everyone's hesitant like that. I had thescarletwoman on my buddy list for months and months before I eventually IMmed her. It should also be noted that I IMmed her away message because I knew she wasn't there. And I almost never IM anyone, even the people that I usually talk to on a regular basis.

It's not that I'm shy. It's just that I'm never sure what I'd talk about with people, so it makes me really wibbly. I hate initiating conversations with people, but I love talking to people. Like the other night when vixenette and I finally talked on AIM, I wasn't shy or anything, and it was really fun to talk to her.

That being said, I'd love to talk to you on AIM or Y!M sometime. I'll never initiate conversation, but I'll talk lots for the most part. :D

[rynne.livejournal.com]

Hee. I talk lots when I've got something to talk about, and that's nearly always if I talk about fandom with someone I know has the same taste in ships or something as me (like you and me could talk about mutual love of Remus/Sirius and mutual hatred of Sirius/James, or whatever), and I can talk to Vixy and Allie and Thistlerose since they're my oldest online friends, but finding something to talk about that's not fandom...oi. (Well, not hard with Allie, but I just know her well enough by now that that's the exception rather than the rule). Anyway, I will put you on my buddy lists! :D

[thistlerose.livejournal.com]

*screeches* Me? It's me? *looks frantically at musesfool and copperbadge. But...but...

*melts*

You're so sweet, and talented, and it was such a pleasure meeting you, and I really hope you decide to go to college in WA. Tacoma's not that far. We can meet up in Seattle sometime and chill.

I'm totally nervous about meeting people and IMing people, too. I have a number of lj friends on my buddy list, and I sometimes see that they're on-line, but I'm often too nervous to strike up a conversation. I'm afraid I won't sound cool. Or something.

Don't get a migraine! By now you should be asleep, so I hope you're sleeping well, and that you wake up refreshed and headache-free. *hugs*

[rynne.livejournal.com]

Yes, you! Your stories and your characterizations and pretty much everything else is just far more real than anyone else's I've read, so much that other characterizations just feel off to me. Victoria and Sam are brilliant and I love their writing too, but yours has something theirs lacks, and I'm not quite sure what it is, but it blows me away.

:D Two of the three colleges I'm applying to are in WA, including my first choice, and I'm fairly sure that I'll be accepted at all of them. I think it's almost a given that I go to WA, especially with you and a bunch of other people there too!

*nods* And everyone wants to sound cool to someone they like/admire. Though I want to know them somewhat at least--I don't like getting random IMs from people I don't know well enough to talk to, and I don't think many other people do either.

I was sleeping when you commented and I woke up headache-free, if not refreshed (six am is spawn of the devil!). Thanks :D.

[greenwitch.livejournal.com]

So shall I message you next time I see you online? :)